5 Steps to Managing Anger: A Guide to Finding Peace at Work

Anger is an emotion that we all experience from time to time, and the workplace is no exception. In today’s fast-paced and often stressful professional environments, it’s common to encounter situations that trigger anger. However, how we handle that anger can significantly impact our work relationships, productivity, and overall well-being. In this blog, we will explore five effective steps to manage anger, each illustrated with a real-life example of someone facing an anger-inducing situation at work.

Step 1: Write What Just Happened

Meet Sarah, a dedicated project manager at a tech company. She recently found herself in a heated argument with a colleague during a team meeting. Sarah felt her anger rising as her colleague criticized her project management skills in front of their boss and the entire team.

To manage her anger, Sarah decided to follow the first step: writing down what just happened. She took a few minutes to jot down the details of the meeting, including what triggered her anger and how she felt about it. This simple act of documenting the situation helped her gain clarity about the incident and her emotional response.

Step 2: Is the “Mad” Telling Me Something?

After the meeting, Sarah continued her anger management journey by reflecting on the second step: considering whether her anger was trying to communicate something important. She asked herself if her colleague’s criticism had any validity.

In Sarah’s case, she realized that although the criticism stung, her colleague had pointed out some areas where her project management could improve. Instead of dismissing her anger, Sarah used it as a signal to self-reflect and identify areas for growth. She decided to use this feedback constructively to enhance her skills.

Step 3: Is Being Angry Useful?

Now, Sarah moved on to the third step: evaluating whether being angry was useful in this situation. She recognized that holding onto her anger could negatively impact her working relationship with her colleague and affect her overall job satisfaction. Sarah knew that carrying around unresolved anger wouldn’t help her become a better project manager or a more pleasant coworker.

As a result, she made a conscious choice to let go of her anger. Sarah understood that this step was vital for her personal well-being and professional growth.

Step 4: What Could Help Me Feel Better Right Now?

Sarah had come a long way in managing her anger, but she still needed to address her immediate emotional state. In the fourth step, she explored strategies to help her feel better at that moment.

Sarah decided to use a healthy distraction technique. She left her desk and took a short walk around the office building to clear her mind. During her walk, she focused on deep breathing and mindfulness, which helped calm her racing thoughts.

In addition, Sarah considered creating an action plan to address her colleague’s feedback. She scheduled a one-on-one meeting with her to discuss their differences and find common ground for improving their working relationship. This proactive approach gave her a sense of control over the situation and reduced her anxiety.

Lastly, Sarah recognized the importance of regular exercise in managing her overall stress levels. She committed to incorporating daily physical activity into her routine to help her cope with workplace challenges more effectively.

Another valuable strategy Sarah employed was asking herself if she was taking the situation personally. She reminded herself that her colleague’s criticism was likely more about the project than her personally. This perspective shift allowed her to detach emotionally and view the situation objectively.

Step 5: Listing Out the Options for Handling the Situation

In the final step, Sarah considered various options for handling the situation with her colleague. She knew that a well-thought-out approach would be more effective than reacting impulsively.

Option 1: Address the issue directly with her colleague in a one-on-one meeting. Pros: Open communication, potential for resolution, improved working relationship. Cons: Confrontational, may not lead to immediate resolution.

Option 2: Seek mediation from a supervisor or HR. Pros: Neutral third-party involvement, structured process. Cons: May escalate the issue, potentially slower resolution.

Option 3: Focus on self-improvement without confronting the colleague. Pros: Personal growth, reduced dependence on external validation. Cons: May not address the root issue, lingering resentment.

Option 4: Discuss the situation with a trusted friend or mentor for guidance. Pros: External perspective, emotional support. Cons: Limited impact on the actual issue.

After careful consideration, Sarah chose option 1, addressing the issue directly with her colleague. She believed that open communication and collaboration were key to resolving the conflict and fostering a more productive working relationship.

Conclusion:

Managing anger in the workplace is a critical skill that can positively impact your professional and personal life. By following these five steps, as demonstrated through Sarah’s example, you can navigate anger-inducing situations with greater ease and effectiveness:

1. Write down what just happened.
2. Consider if your anger is conveying an important message.
3. Evaluate whether being angry is useful in the given situation.
4. Explore strategies to help you feel better in the moment.
5. List out the options for handling the situation, considering the pros and cons of each.

Remember that anger is a natural emotion, but how you choose to respond to it can make all the difference in maintaining a harmonious workplace and fostering your own personal growth.